The Ottery
“If an otter can’t have fun doing something, it just simply won’t do it.”

The 80th Academy Awards: The Day After

February 25th, 2008

Alas, I had to cancel my own Oscars party last night, not due to the writers’ strike (at least that would have put me in good company with the Vanity Fair party), but due to my own habit of acquiring colds at inconvenient times. I considered live-blogging the whole thing, but thought that might be almost as taxing as hosting a party, so decided to go for the simple day-after summary. And here it is:

• Jon Stewart is one of my favorite Oscars hosts. I don’t think he was quite as funny last night as he was two years ago, and it’s clear that Hollywood still doesn’t quite know what to do with him (“Wait . . . is he making fun of us?”), but still, much better than last year’s Snore-Fest with Ellen. I particularly liked the bit where he complimented Cate Blanchett’s range, mentioning that she was nominated this year for playing Queen Elizabeth I and Bob Dylan, and then going on to assert that, unknown to most viewers, Cate Blanchett also played the role of the pit bull in No Country for Old Men. Hee! As some of you know, No Country for Old Men is shut out of my own personal Otter Oscars, because I can’t bring myself to see dog death, and I know that said pit bull meets a tragic end. But maybe if I tell myself that it’s Cate Blanchett playing a pit bull, I can get through it. And yes, that is different from knowing the dog playing the pit bull was not actually harmed. Don’t ask me how it’s different, but it is.
• Speaking of Cate Blanchett, she looked fabulous. As usual.
• Amy Adams did a good job in her first Oscars song performance (of “Happy Working Song” from Enchanted), but, goodness, would it hurt to give the girl some props (literally)? She desperately needs some vermin to sing to. We kept waiting for some pigeons to drop from the ceiling or something, but no luck. “Falling Slowly” needed no props in its glorious simplicity, “That’s How You Know” benefited from a song-and-dance number to distract from its somewhat lackluster lyrics, and “So Close” had costumed ballroom dancers to keep the audience from falling asleep. Adams needed prop-support not because the song is weak—it’s very clever and actually my second-favorite out of the nominated bunch—but because it’s the one that makes the least sense outside of the context of the film. See here for yourself. Now, can you imagine having to sing that on an empty stage by yourself? I want to know who made that decision, and I want to send Cate Blanchett the Pit Bull after them. I’m assuming that it wasn’t Amy Adams herself who made the decision, because, in my book, she can do no wrong.
• While we’re on the topic of Best Song, let’s take a moment to reflect on the adorableness of Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova, who, in truth, produced not only the Best Song and, I would argue, one of the best movies of the year, but also one of the best Oscars broadcast moments. When Irglova’s own song cut her off during their acceptance speech, she looked disappointed but gamely left the stage. Then, after the commercial break, Jon Stewart actually brought her back onstage to deliver her thank-yous. Hurrah! In honor of Hansard and Irglova, here’s “Falling Slowly,” in case you had the misfortune to miss it. And here’s a montage (montage!) of some of 2007’s movies, set to “Falling Slowly.”
• Can we say Bourne Ultimatum Sweep? Three awards, which is more than any other film except No Country for Old Men, which earned four. So they were “only” Film Editing, Sound Mixing, and Sound Editing, but my theory is that Oscar voters racked up the little awards for The Bourne Ultimatum because they felt guilty that they didn’t nominate it for Best Picture above Michael Clayton (directed by Tony Gilroy, who wrote all three Bourne movies), and they recognized that Bourne Ultimatum is actually a better movie, even if it isn’t traditional “Oscar-worthy” fare. I’m sure that’s what voters were thinking. Even if they didn’t realize it.
• Now, Michael Clayton did have amazing acting, which is why I wasn’t unhappy to see the Tilda Swinton Best Supporting Actress upset. Plus, she gave one of the most entertaining acceptance speeches of the evening. My one disappointment: while her dress was severely unflattering, it wasn’t the level of nuttiness I would expect from Swinton. She could get away with something like Bjork’s swan or Imogen Heap’s head-shrubbery. She is the White Witch, after all.
• Speaking of nuts, um, Daniel Day-Lewis? Did it disturb anyone else how he referred to his real-life wife (who also happens to be playwright Arthur Miller’s daughter) as “Mrs. Plainview”? (His character’s name in There Will Be Blood is Daniel Plainview.) I’ve heard Mr. Day-Lewis is very “method” and stays in character even off set, but, dude, the MOVIE’S OVER. I’m sure your wife would appreciate not being referred to as the wife of a fictional psychopathic oil tycoon. Actually, though, given the insanity of her Oscars apparel, maybe she doesn’t mind.
• Daniel Day-Lewis did redeem himself somewhat by kneeling and asking Dame Helen Mirren to knight him with his Oscar, which she did with the inherent grace she displays everywhere. I think this moment proves what we all already knew, which is that Helen Mirren IS STILL THE QUEEN. She definitely wins the award for best dress of the evening. I read somewhere that she told someone on the red carpet that she’d knitted a little scarf for her Oscar. Ha!

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